Leichlingen, 8 August 2004
Discipline
Today's topic is one that has been in the news a lot recently, especially in connection with schools:
Discipline
Many things are no longer running smoothly in German schools.
According to the Pisa study, our schools are rather poor by global standards.
Entrepreneurs complain that many school leavers can't even write reasonably well.
Teachers complain that they can no longer cope with their pupils.
Various possible solutions are now being discussed.
Among other things, there is always talk of the so-called "secondary virtues", which should be given more importance again, including social behaviour and discipline.
And some politicians have already suggested that these secondary virtues should be graded again. There is always talk of a grade for "behaviour".
I had a look at my old primary school reports, and lo and behold, some of my secondary virtues were still graded.
There was "leadership", "domestic diligence" and "participation in lessons".
In "class participation" my grade always fluctuated between 2 and 4, but in "leadership" I was always "good".
That's probably why I was able to leave primary school after four years,
because of good behaviour ;-)
By "leadership" I meant general behaviour in class, discipline and social behaviour. So apparently I wasn't a bad pupil.
However, this was certainly partly due to the harsh regime that our teacher ran.
I still had a representative of the generation that dealt out blows to the back of the head and slaps in the face.
Nevertheless, most of the class, including me, liked this teacher because he could also be very funny and taught well. He retired after my third year.
Looking back, I have a somewhat ambivalent view of the "hard hand".
For pupils who did reasonably well, "the hard hand" was rather positive. There was a certain amount of pressure, which was somehow also motivating. I learnt a lot and was able to write largely without mistakes after primary school.
It was sometimes very difficult for pupils who were weaker learners or had other school problems (e.g. spelling difficulties) because they often got a slap on the wrist. They didn't speak so positively about the teacher.
Personally, I'm quite glad that this time is over.
I'm not fundamentally against giving children who don't want to listen a few spankings, but I'm definitely against others doing that to my children.
But is it possible to establish discipline without "the heavy hand"?
Is it possible without discipline?
I don't think so, but how do we learn discipline?
What does "discipline" even mean?
The word "discipline" comes from the Latin word "discipulus", which means "the pupil". There is also the word "discipula", which means "the pupil".
"Discipline" therefore affects both men and women.
So if you're a student, you can't do it without discipline.
What is it like to be a Christian?
Most of those present here describe themselves as disciples of Jesus.
In English, by the way, "disciple" comes from the Latin word "discipulus" or "discipula" mentioned earlier.
A disciple is actually nothing more than a pupil.
However, being a disciple was more holistic.
It was not just about learning from the teacher in certain subjects, but about learning from the teacher's whole life.
After all, Jesus lived with his disciples for about three years, during which time they acquired knowledge from him through his words and learnt how to live through his life.
This was nothing special at the time. In various places in the Old Testament, e.g. in 2 Kings 2, prophet disciples were mentioned who lived with a prophet to a large extent in order to learn from him.
What is it like for us today?
How do we understand our Christianity?
Do we have the school model in mind?
On Sundays we go to Jesus at school, the church service, and sometimes during the week to the house group or other events.
There we learn what a Christian needs to know.
The daily Bible reading could then be seen as "domestic diligence", a kind of homework.
Incidentally, I always got a "good" in primary school, but maybe that was because of the "hard hand".
Applied to being a Christian: if you don't do any quiet time, then the day will fail.
Is this the right understanding of discipleship?
Joh. 8, 31 says:
"If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples."
So accumulating knowledge is the right way to go?
In Joh. 13, 34.35 it says:
"A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; that as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."
Do you learn this according to the school principle?
Along the lines of "This morning we'll preach about 'love' and tomorrow you'll be able to do it"?
Of course, it's not that simple, but we can ask ourselves what the actual situation is here.
Do guests who visit us often recognise that we treat each other with love?
Can a guest perhaps recognise this on their first visit?
Do we differ from clubs or other interest groups in this respect?
But we are still left with the question of how to become a disciple of Jesus in the right way.
In his farewell discourses in the Gospel of John, Jesus says something about this:
Joh. 14, 26;
"But the Counsellor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have said to you."
Teaching and remembering alone is not enough, but it is part of being a disciple of Jesus.
Joh. 16, 13-15;
"But when he, the Spirit of truth, has come, he will guide you into all the truth; for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you what is coming.
He will glorify me, for from what is mine he will receive and declare to you.
All that the Father has is mine; therefore I said that he will receive from what is mine and will declare to you."
This is explained in more detail here.
The key word here is "lead".
When you guide someone, you let them do it, but you are always ready to give help, tips and advice.
I can immediately see an important difference between this and the school system.
At school, if you're lucky, you're taught knowledge, but you don't learn how to use it.
The Holy Spirit, on the other hand, guides us to life.
We learn to know the truth and also to live it, because the whole truth lies in a changed life.
Joh. 15, 7.8;
"If you remain in me and my words remain in you, you will ask what you wish and it will be done for you. In this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and become my disciples."
We are to bear fruit. And one fruit is that we are so changed that God answers our prayers. Unanswered prayers can be due to a lack of change.
Let's stay a little longer with fruit and the Holy Spirit.
According to Galatians 5:22-23, the fruit that the Holy Spirit produces in us consists of the following parts:
"Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, abstinence."
Instead of "abstinence", you can also say "self-control". And instead of "self-control", you can certainly also say "self-discipline", which brings us back to the topic.
However, "discipline" and "self-discipline" are not the same thing.
"Discipline" can be established from the outside, with harshness if necessary. That's how it's done in the military, for example.
Self-discipline is much more difficult, as I realised at university.
If no one tells you what to do, you often don't do it, even if you should.
Self-discipline is difficult to learn yourself. And that applies even more to the other components of the fruit of the Holy Spirit "love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness"
The Bible claims - by calling these things the fruit of the Spirit - that without the Holy Spirit you cannot really live these things yourself.
I'll leave this - actually outrageous - assertion as it is, because it leads a little away from the actual topic.
So what about self-discipline, self-control and renunciation?
Although some politicians preach "doing without" in relation to social benefits, I have the impression that this is because a real reform of the social systems is not wanted or cannot be implemented, and so benefits are cut first, so that everything remains affordable somehow and a reform can be postponed once again.
But let's look at ourselves again. How self-disciplined are you, am I?
I personally see some deficits in my life and find it a struggle in some respects. Perhaps you feel the same way.
If what it says is true, then it can't be an eternal, exhausting battle.
But God doesn't always give easy, quick victories either.
I think the first step is always to recognise the problem before God.
Do we admit to ourselves that we have self-discipline problems, perhaps in contrast to the prevailing zeitgeist?
Do we want to be changed by Jesus? Only then can the Holy Spirit work.
This is the right way to self-discipline.
One subject area is still missing:
We also have the task of instilling discipline in our environment, not just when we are teachers.
As parents, for example, we have to make it very clear that self-discipline is useful. The best way to do this, of course, is by example. One problem with this, of course, is that you usually only know whether the upbringing was good when the children have grown up.
But being a role model is clearly the No. 1 task.
Even if you don't have children of your own, there are children and younger people around you who - consciously or unconsciously - take their lead from their elders.
Another area of family struggle is the discipline applied when living together.
For example, I remember when my father wanted to take photos of my brother and me, we often made faces.
My father would always jump in a triangle.
Today I'm the father, and what else should my middle son do but make faces in photos. Today I'm always jumping in triangles.
Of course, you can always apply the "hard hand" principle - and I believe that it is sometimes necessary - but often you get further with wisdom.
I already have an idea for the photo problem so that I don't always have to jump in a triangle, and I'll try it out next time.
But how do you teach children discipline?
It is not the most important thing to teach children, but it is important.
I find it difficult to answer this question in a simple way.
It is true that it only works with a combination of love and consistency, with love being the more important part.
If the child is not loved, then it will perish mentally, no matter how good the upbringing is.
I would like to preface the following reflections on parenting with this sentence.
Consistency is part of parenting and consistency also means that there can be a few spankings if certain boundaries are exceeded. But I think that also depends on the child, as all children are different, of course.
There are some verses in Proverbs that sound quite harsh in this context;
e.g. Proverbs 13:24;
"He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him seeks him out early with chastisement."
One could take this verse - and some others from Proverbs - to mean that beating is the first choice as a means of education. I don't think that's how it's meant, even if a few spankings can certainly occur as a last resort.
I would like to generalise the verse in such a way that the rod corresponds to an announced, meaningful punishment and the blow with the rod corresponds to the execution of the punishment.
Perhaps that's too liberal an interpretation, but it corresponds to my current level of knowledge, and I'm still very much on my way, especially when it comes to education.
"He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him seeks him out early with chastisement."
Punishments are also usually unpleasant for the punisher and it is apparently the easier way to always give in. And the verse is particularly aimed at such people.
These are the people who buy their children something at the till in the shop where the nagging goods such as ice cream, sweets, etc. are sold so that the children will be quiet.
This is of course easier than saying no, sticking to it and threatening the children with consequences if they don't stop whingeing.
This would also be an important experience for children to learn self-discipline.
Of course, it's different if you agree with the child beforehand that they can choose one thing. But then they have to stick to it.
You have to educate children from the very beginning. Once the children are teenagers, the education is largely over.
Proverbs 22:15;
"Foolishness is chained to the heart of the child; the rod of discipline will remove it."
According to the Bible, man is fundamentally evil.
And if this is true, then this wickedness must somehow become evident in every child, and it will, otherwise no education would be necessary.
A child can be mean, evil, lie, etc. all by itself; you don't have to teach it that. You have to drive it out through education and education also includes the execution of announced punishments.
Proverbs 23:13; "Do not deprive the boy of chastisement; if you beat him with the rod, he will not die."
Executing a meaningful, announced punishment does not kill the child. On the contrary, it shows the child that their actions are taken seriously and have consequences.
If you threaten a child with a punishment for misbehaviour and then don't carry it out, you are not taking the child seriously.
Proverbs 29, 15; "The rod and discipline give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame on his mother."
What happens to children that nobody cares about, that nobody brings up? Children that nobody takes seriously?
It can happen that such children become antisocial, antisocial in the sense that they can no longer fit properly into a community. Neglected children are more likely than average to commit offences. The police are often the first real authority to encounter such children.
I admire people who look after such children and try to give them a home, because of course each of these children is also loved by God and infinitely valuable.
So, do we agree that consistent education is necessary?
There are also other verses in the Bible about children and parents.
Eph. 6, 1-4;
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honour your father and mother," which is the first commandment with a promise, "that it may go well with you and that you may live long on the earth."
"And you fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and admonition of the Lord."
Or Col. 3, 20.21;
"Children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing in the Lord.
Fathers, do not be angry with your children, lest they become discouraged."
I don't want to say much about these verses, but from a parent's point of view, this is about justice. Children often become angry, resentful or discouraged when they feel they are being treated unfairly.
Of course, children also grumble on other occasions such as "doing their homework" or "going to bed", but I am sure that if children feel they have been treated unfairly over a longer period of time, then something in them is broken.
And that could certainly be the cause of a lack of discipline and rebelliousness in some cases.
And another important point:
Discipline must never be an end in itself, but must always have a purpose.
Children should be brought up to ask questions (e.g. Deuteronomy 6:20) and of course they are also allowed to question the meaning of disciplinary behaviour and disciplinary measures in specific situations.
Discipline is of course much easier to enforce if those affected understand the meaning, even if this is not always possible.
And finally:
Just as the Holy Spirit wants to guide us into all truth in matters of self-discipline, He wants to do the same in matters of child-rearing when it comes to instilling discipline.
AMEN